- When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California , would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
- The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. The insurance agent tried the machine… and he also lost a finger. The chef’s claim was approved.
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Susie Lee done fell in love,
She planned to marry Joe.
She was so happy ’bout it all,
She told her Pappy so.
Pappy told her, “Susie gal,
You’ll have to find another.
I’d just as soon yo’ Ma don’t know,
But Joe is yo’ half-brother.”
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A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested. But she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.
The wife, after sleeping soundly for an hour, awakened without pain. As it was still early, she decided to go on to the party. Because her husband didn’t know what her costume was, she thought she’d have some fun by watching to see how he acted when she was not with him.
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The place I work occasionally requires us to go out to get various types of training.
One day, they sent us out to a “personality clinic” to have our personality types assessed and identify any potential character flaws.
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Jill was discussing the various aspects and possible outcome of the insurance policy with the man at the insurance agency.
They had pretty much nailed down the details on how much insurance she and her husband would need, how long they’d need it, and so forth.
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As a veterinarian, I was called at home in the middle of the night by a woman in distress.
She had swallowed her dog’s heart worm pill by mistake. I knew it wouldn’t harm her, but by law, I’m forbidden to give medical advice.
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Teeing off on the 12th hole at a golf resort, we stopped to buy cold drinks from the young woman driving the beverage cart. As my buddy reached for his wallet, he said to her,
“You’re in great shape. You must work out a lot.”
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The young man entered the Ice Cream Palace and asked, “What kinds of ice cream do you have?”
“Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry,” the girl wheezed as she spoke, patted her chest and seemed unable to continue.
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Traveling down the interstate and needing to use the bathroom, I stopped at a rest area and headed to the restrooms.
I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: “Hi, how are you?”
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Did you hear about the two guys who decided to try duck hunting?
They bought new outfits & equipment, and went out to a place in the woods where they heard the hunting was really good.
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